


I'm not a Girl

by TheRealMrSeahorseman



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Big Brother Jesse McCree, F/F, F/M, Gen, His name is Forrest Grace, M/M, Platonic Relationships, Same Race Horse AU, They are like good brothers, Trans Male Character, Young Jesse McCree, best bros, eventual mchanzo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:01:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27598598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealMrSeahorseman/pseuds/TheRealMrSeahorseman
Summary: Five times that Jesse heard Grace say he was not a girl and once he does it for his little brother.
Relationships: Jesse McCree/Hanzo Shimada, Jesse McCree/Original Male Character(s), Reaper | Gabriel Reyes/Soldier: 76 | Jack Morrison
Comments: 6
Kudos: 9





	1. The First time he said

* 1 *  
The first time Jesse heard Forrest murmur about not being a girl they had just met.

Forrest was eighteen and Jesse was twenty-one, he should have known it was a bad idea to let the boy steal some of Gabriel's beers from the fridge, but that was something Jesse of the Future should be concerned about - the reckless cowboy weighed - they sat on the mezzanine of the dusty barn while talking and between one beer and another, Grace started to get emotional.

"I just don't understand how I got to get that deep, like, in the rock bottom." said the boy, hood pulled over his head, and the only thing that indicated he was there was the vapor of his breath against the cold air.

"You know, I don't usually take offense easily, but it hurt, partner." McCree said with a wry smile, trying to get some laugh out of Forrest - anything but that melancholy tone he had now. That at least made the least look at him.

Even if it was with that deadly look at him.

On the cell phone of the youngest a song was playing, Jesse could see on the display that it was Lullaby, from Unlike Pluto. It was a song with constant drums and high-pitched guitar, the bass loud and frantic, but essentially calm, sad.

"If I had known you were the type of weepy drunk, I would have brought my box of tissues." laughed Jesse, putting an arm around the youngest's shoulders, “What made you so sad, buddy? You can trust me."

Jesse felt his shoulders go up and then go down, the sigh came out of his nose in a new cloud of white vapor and Grace wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his sweatshirt, a lock of brown curls fell over his eyes and the boy pulled it away to put behind the ear.

"I just feel as a... strange, wherever I go, it doesn't feel like home." the boy pulled his legs against his chest, drinking a large sip of beer before continuing, "I don't know how I got to that point in my life, without a home, without a family, without a girlfriend and living in the house of three strangers."

Jesse snorted.

"We've had this conversation before, shortie, you've been in the family since the moment you walked in that door." said McCree with a gentle sway of his body against that of the smallest.

That was a bad idea, as it made Grace shrug and clearly swallow. "Er... Jesse?" called the smallest.

"Yes?" asked the biggest.

And then a wave of vomit spurted from Forrest's mouth, as if a bucket had been thrown from up there, Jesse was startled and pulled him over the edge, praying it was just that, the young Englishman sobbed and cringed even smaller, Jesse had to pick him up. "Well, now, enough for you, darlin’." the cowboy threw Grace's arms around his neck and his legs around his waist, considering he was light as a feather, it was no problem carrying him like this, “Time for the kids to go to bed or Gabe is going to kill us when he finds out that I let you drink a whole crate alone.” Jesse felt the younger one start to tighten his arms around his neck and sob, tears wetting the old red poncho around his shoulders as the older man descended the stairs to the top with him.

"I'm not a girl..." said Forrest in a sob, "I hate being a girl, nobody believes that I... I'm not a girl..." whined the little one.

Jesse stopped, confused.

"But darlin'... you’re not a girl, you’re a boy… you’re Forrest." said Jesse trying to peer over the boy's unruly curls.

Silence.

More silence.

Jesse started to think that Grace had fainted.

And then he murmured.

"Thanks for reminding me of that, cowboy." he sighed, petting the backs of the cowboy.

Jesse didn't understand what he meant by that and they never brought it up again.

Not even when, the other day, Gabriel asked about the huge vomit spot in the middle of the barn.


	2. The second time he said

The second time was on the day that Grace was feeling too sick to work.

Jesse began to suspect that there was something different about the boy because Forrest had been sick at least once a month since he had gone to work at the Morrison-Reyes house, Gabe always told him not to disturb the boy with this, but McCree was starting to get worried. The cowboy went up the stairs and knocked on the door that separated the attic from the rest of the house.

When there was no answer, Jesse decided to enter.

He found Forrest curled up like a ball, hunched over his body and whimpering in pain on the bed.

"Hey, partner." called Jesse kneeling in front of the bed, where the boy could see him, “What are you feeling? Is there anything I can do to help you out there? ” he asked, brushing some hair out of Grace's face.

Forrest's eyes were watering, it seemed that, whatever it was, it was too intense for the little Englishman to bear. "Y-yeah ... I think you can help..." he whimpered, shrugging his toes, "Socks, a pair of socks and hot water in a heat bag." he said, Jesse immediately stood up and looked for a thick pair of pink, purple and blue striped socks - an inside joke, since they were both bisexual.

He had given him the pair of socks on Grace's first Christmas with them, which had happened about two months ago, shortly after the two had a long conversation about it and Grace told McCree that this was one of the reasons why he left home. Jesse patted Forrest on the back and the youngest gets off his ball, turning on his back so that Jesse could put the socks on him.

The elder covered him and gently kissed his forehead.

"Sometimes it is difficult to remember that I am not a girl these days." muttered Forrest when he felt Jesse's hands stretching out his palms, fingers and massaging his extension.

"Why, sweetie?" asked Jesse confused, "You are not a girl, you are a boy, and I am sure that everyone here thinks the same thing." said McCree, Grace's eyes widened a little.

His small smile soothed Jesse's heart.

"Yeah... yeah, you're right, Jess, I'm not a girl." laughed the smallest patting Jesse's thigh, where his hand was resting on.

"You are a strange guy, Grace." said McCree rubbing his tousled brown hair, "I don't know what makes you think sometimes that you're a girl." he laughed, getting up and fetching the rest of the things Grace had asked for.

It didn't take long for Jesse to come back and find the youngest with his eyes fixed on the patchwork blanket on his legs, looking disappointed or sad - he couldn't say for sure. "Hey." called the cowboy, Grace looked up to face the big one, “Everything okay? We can distract you if you're thinking too much about something. ” suggested Jesse, Forrest wiped his teary eyes and let McCree put the bag on his belly.

"What's your idea?" asked the smallest.

"I know you love this Japanese animation thing, I just kind of know Studio Ghibli, what do you say?" asked back, Grace smirked.

"Now we are speaking in the same language, cowboy, I know one that you will like." he said taking control of his XBox and entered the Netflix app.

The matter was promptly forgotten.

Hours later, Reyes found them sleeping together like two lazy cats and he called Jack to see the scene: Jesse with practically his whole body folded on the small iron bed with Forrest equally curled up and cuddled in his lap. They just closed the door, not wanting to wake the two sleep-heads.


	3. The third time he said

* 3 *

The third time that Jesse heard his brother say he wasn't a girl was in a totally different situation.

Forrest was very upset that day, he had tried to meet a person he met on an app, Grace just didn’t count that before even reaching the cafe where they had scheduled the meeting, the person gave up for some reason that Jesse didn’t knew why he or she did.

He was the one who took him with the faded rust red Ford pickup truck he called a car, Jesse knew he was upset, but he didn't show it - or thought he wasn't showing it, considering Jesse could read him like an open book - when he sat in the passenger seat and started drumming his fingers on the dashboard.

Jesse knew him well enough to know it was a nervous tic and he was in a bad mood now, so he didn't even deviate from the city route, getting a suspicious look from his brother.

"What are you doing?" asked the little Englishman angrily, Jesse shrugged.

“What does it look like I'm doing? I won't waste gas for nothing if some idiot guy didn't want to meet my little brother. ” McCree said, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel, one arm dangling his elbow out the window, the windows down to enjoy the cool autumn air.

"How do you know it was a man?" asked the smallest with a shrug.

"I'm just saying, only a man with half a brain would refuse an invitation to have coffee with a cute little thing like you." he said, raising his eyebrows, Forrest rolled his eyes.

"You're right, I have to find one with no brain like you, just yourself to find me cute." grunted Grace, Jesse snorted a laugh, "What's so fun, cowboy?"

"Simple, only you think you are not cute or handsome or anything good about your appearance." he said around a corner, he knew exactly where the little one was going to take his day off.

"You're an idiot." replied Forrest, pulling on the black cap he wore even more on his face.

Jesse just laughed parking the car in front of the cafe of a friendly owner called Mei, she was the "official donut supplier" of the Police Station, since the wife was a police officer. The older one got out of the truck and walked around the car to open the door for the younger brother to get out.

"Caballero." said Jesse with a broad hand gesture, as if opening a limousine door, Forrest just snorted and marched out.

"I would appreciate it if you stopped making fun of me." snarled the smaller one, crossing his arms over his chest and his chin curled against it, Jesse blinked a few times in confusion, "I'm not a girl for you to treat me this way."

Jesse had to control his urge to laugh - no, to laugh - at what his brother had said, the cowboy was not so lucky and his lips trembled before bursting into a loud, spontaneous laugh.

He had to hold his belly with one hand and wipe the tears from his eyes with the other. “Oh! Oh, Forrest... " he laughed more,"Do you think I'm kidding or making fun of you? No, darlin', you don't have to be a girl for me to treat you like that, can't an older brother take his little brother out and have dinner? ”

Grace's face was flushed with embarrassment and the boy had to pull the entire cap over his head.

"No, you are right." he said in embarrassment, taking off his cap and his curls practically jumping out of it, "Thanks, Jesse, I owe you that."

Jesse gave a huge smile when he saw his little brother's smile slowly appear at the corners of his lips. "No problem, partner." replied entering the cafe with him.

That little piece of heaven would become Forrest's favorite place after that night, the smallest one felt truly protected and welcomed there, and most importantly, it would be one of the best moments he and Jesse spent together outside the farm.


	4. The fourth time he said

* 4 *

The fourth time was when Forrest had a serious accident on the farm.

Jesse thought it would be safe for him to ride the new horse they bought, the most recent acquisition was rather skittish and went by the name of Reaper.

Little did Jesse know that the name wasn't just for the show, it was more of a bad joke than anything else.

"Now you approach slowly." said as quietly and softly as he could pronounce the words, Forrest nodded and slowly climbed the fence that separated him from the horse in his paddock - he was never afraid of horses, he even liked those animals - and sat down to ride the horse, "Good boy, Reaper, very good boy..." said, stroking his muzzle.

Grace stretched out his leg to reach across the horse and sit on his back, Jesse holding up a finger so he was as quiet as possible now, Forrest obeyed the instructions as correctly as possible, but what they didn't count on was what it would happen shortly thereafter.

"Good, very good, Reaper." said Jesse moving away from the animal, "Remember what I taught you?" asked quietly to the youngest, Grace nodded.

As soon as Reaper felt something on his back and saw Jesse standing next to him, he realized he had been “tricked”, McCree saw when the animal's pupils contracted and he neighed loudly, rearing with Forrest on top of him trying to hold on on his neck, the boy screamed and Reaper tried to shake him from above. Jesse had to walk away or he would be trampled and then it happened.

Reaper reared one last time and felt that whoever was on his back had thrown off balance and kicked his back paws in the air, Jesse only had time to shout his younger brother's name before he was on the other side of the picket fence with bleeding head and unconscious.

The subsequent moments were one of absolute terror, they had to call an ambulance and Jesse kept murmuring that it was all his fault while Gabriel and Jack ran to get the car and go to the hospital with their adopted son, the cowboy didn't stop walking back and forth while he didn't hear that his brother was doing well.

There was only one problem.

"Hey, Angie!" said Jesse relieved, "What's the news?"

The blonde woman smiled at him, Angela Ziegler was a well-known family doctor. "Don't worry, guys, she'll be fine."

Jesse went pale for a minute.

"She? But… Forrest…? ”

Forrest was not a girl, he was /sure/ Grace was a boy, and here was Angela saying he was a girl? There must be something very wrong with that. Angela stared back for a moment and then something lit up her face.

"Oh... oh! She... I mean, /he/'ll be fine, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't know he was a transgender boy. ” the doctor apologized.

Now it all made more sense in Jesse's head and he ran in the direction Angela had come, not even giving her time to tell which room the boy was in.

"Young lady, we need to do this, it's the procedure!" said the voice of a nurse, Jesse stopped running to pay attention, the furious growls that followed were very familiar.

"I said it once and I'm not going to say it again: I'm not a girl!" yelled the voice, Jesse was sure that this was his brother.

Yes, brother, without a doubt, Forrest was a boy and it didn't matter if he wasn't born with the same body type as Jesse, he was a boy like anyone in that family and no one would make the cowboy change his mind about it. Jesse entered the room and two nurses tried to hold Forrest on the bed, the three of them widened their eyes at McCree's entrance.

"I'll take over from here, gentlemen." said the cowboy, the nurses seemed annoyed to be chased away without finishing the job.

The young man's green eyes blinked and filled with tears.

"Jesse... Jesse, I'm sorry, I lied to you all this time, forgive me, I'm not a---" he sobbed, cringing, Jesse held him and hissed as if talking to a wild horse.

"You are a boy, I never doubted that." said Jesse, his hand moving up and down his back at a soothing pace.

The boy sobbed once before grabbing Jesse's back with all his strength, fingers curling around his red plaid shirt.

"Thanks, Jesse ..."


	5. The fifth time he said

* 5 *

The fifth time he said he wasn't a girl, Jesse was more aware of what it meant.

The cowboy was sleeping peacefully when he heard small hesitant footsteps on the floor and then the bed sank to his feet and a slow drag between the blankets, tiny hands clinging to the fabric of his shirt and a constant sniff, as if the person were crying, Jesse turned on the lamp to find the little Englishman huddled against his chest.

"What's the matter, darlin'?" asked Jesse involving the younger brother in a tight hug, or rather, as firm as he could with one arm, the other was stuck under his head.

"I had a nightmare." said in a small voice, Jesse knew what this nightmare was.

"You know they can't hurt you, right?" asked rolling over onto his side and keeping his back on the bed, Grace rolled over to lie on his stomach with his body on top of Jesse, "What you dreamed is not even close to the truth, do you hear?" he said kissing the top of his messy hair.

Forrest nodded, curling himself further against the larger man's body, feeling his body tremble even more.

After the accident a few months ago, Grace would wake up in the middle of the night, crying and afraid to be thrown out of the house, he would tell Jesse that he had nightmares that they would throw him out the same way his mother did and the cowboy assured him that it would never happen.

On nights like this, Forrest crawled into McCree's bed and the two of them talked for a while until the anxiety crisis passed, which always ended with the two of them sleeping together in Jesse's bed.

"I am not a girl, right?" asked the smallest in a broken voice, Jesse shook his head.

"No, not even a little." said rubbing his back, he frowned when he felt something tight and rough under his fingers and the soft fabric of the little boy's pajamas, "Are you wearing this to sleep?" asked in a voice still a little hoarse with sleep, Grace nodded, "Darlin', you know this is going to hurt you like this." he said sweetly to his brother.

"I felt bad, I couldn't look at myself without this, so I kept..." he said in an embarrassed murmur, Jesse shook his head.

"I know, sweetie, but it won't do you any good, let me help you." said Jesse sitting on the bed, Grace also sat up and turned his back on his brother, "You will not stop being a boy if you sleep without it, this will hurt your chest all night, you will get huge bruises." he explained patiently as he opened the lock.

Forrest breathed a sigh of relief when the band fell on his lap and he felt Jesse pull the restrictive material over his shirt, never touching it more than necessary, "Thank you." he said looking over his shoulder, eyes circled by deep dark circles and looking too tired, Jesse nodded and lay down again, Forrest joined his brother and sank into his soft chest.

“You will always be my little brother, understand? My surly little brother and coffee addict who keeps telling me how reckless and clumsy I am, no matter if you were born different from some other guys, I know there are other kids out there who also think like you, but for me, you always it's going to be the same Forrest I know. ” said Jesse, feeling the weight of the youngster's shoulders giving way, "And I will always disturb you with Forrest Gump jokes." McCree laughed amused when he felt the punch in the ribs.

"I've spoken a million times, McCree, I was an MMA fan." he muttered, burying his face even deeper in Jesse's ribs.

It didn't lessen the smile he felt Grace was giving even though she couldn't see him.


End file.
